I’ve been feeling this lately: I want to talk more about resilience. About reclaiming joy and peace—or, maybe, uncovering them; expanding into them. And, I think, I want to talk about challenge.
About mourning, about change.
About what it feels like to lose.
About what it feels like to walk through pain.
And I want to show another side.
The other side is not one where we rise by moving on. Where we lose the past, forget, leave it behind us. As we move through challenge or loss or pain, we simply become deeper versions of ourselves—we emerge more. We emerge more aware. We emerge with more sense of meaning. We emerge more ourselves.
But this doesn’t mean that the old parts of ourselves simply disappear, that they are no longer part of us, that they no longer tell our stories. No, it’s simply that, now, we’ve unveiled new sides of ourselves we hadn’t uncovered before.
We are expanding.
We must help each other realize that walking through pain or challenge is completely normal and completely ok. We do not have to fear the darkness or think we’ve done something wrong when we’re in it. No, we must learn that darkness is a journey we all travel at some point—many points—and it is the essence of us, it is what brings interest and obstacles and triumph and life into our existences.
Because darkness is not depression; darkness is uncertainty. Darkness is leaving the shore to set out for something unclear but intuitively felt. Darkness is following signs from the universe when the way is otherwise unmarked. Darkness is a calling. Darkness inspires trust.
We must greet darkness as the gift that it is and, to do so, we must be filled with and share our parables of darkness as a teacher, a sacred journey, a guide, a lesson. And we must be filled with parables of darkness receding, and what happens when we rise from it, it underpinning and rooting our ascent.
But, let us be clear, darkness doesn’t recede once in our lives and then it is done. It flows through us like a wave, ebbing and flowing. We must see that it is part of our story, our creation and re-creation stories throughout life.
Do not push it away for you will be rejecting a part of yourself.